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I no longer post here anymore. I can be found at a new home!

I have to fly to Sweden

Thursday I received an email from the guy whose apartment I left the majority of my boxes in storage with when I left Sweden (on what I expected was a temporary basis). Anyways, he wrote from Indonesia to tell me he was just notified by his landlord that the apartment is being sold and everything has to be out before 15 April.

So I’m counting quarters with my parents right now but it’s tentatively scheduled that I’ll be back in Stockholm from 1-10 April, which is coming up pretty soon. My friends have offered free places to stay, as well as free beer and food… which is a relief. I can’t afford much else past the airfare over there.

Anyways, I’ve been a little stressed out lately because of that. 2010 is proving to be just as busy as 2009 was… G goes to England in 2 weeks to test some foreign helicopters, and then he comes back and I have to fly over… I wish I had enough play money to take the boat to Finland or visit my friends in Estonia I don’t think I’ll have another shot at visiting Sweden for a while.

I’m sorry, but I needed to rant

This is a rant about being mistaken for “a typical Air Force spouse”. I originally posted it on Facebook.

Oh! How delightful a term you’ve all labeled me. I find it so humorous when people I barely know choose to define me based off loose assumptions. These people could simply ask the questions that matter, but they don’t, because they’re more comfortable believing everyone has the same story.

Where was I about a year ago?
It wasn’t in a military town on the east coast or the west coast. In fact I was in a country called Sweden, where the beer was expensive but I could drink on the subway.

Where did I see my future?
Not in this country actually. I wanted to stay in Sweden… Forever…

What changed?
Well obviously my path changed. It brought me all the way around the world again to Seattle… but essentially my goals have not changed at all. I still seek high professional achievements. I want to finish my degree, and then I’d like to go back into the military once I can dispute and clear my previous discharge with the board.

None of this has changed since I met G.

A strong relationship needs both parties to have interesting lives of their own to share. I’m pretty sure I’ve already lived an interesting life actually, but the past apparently doesn’t count. Only the present matters; and because I’m presently unemployed and obviously struggling to find my feet, the assumption is I will be this way forever.

Incorrect. How long have you know me for? How many times have you seen me fall? How often have you seen me bounce back?

I’m not known by the people close to me for approaching my life as if there’s some book of guidelines telling me my options. I find my options, even when I’m not trying to… If I learn that I really suck at something I’m probably not going to continue torturing myself with it.

I’m technically unemployed right now but I know that I’m employable. I’ve made the decision that I will probably not have another opportunity (like right now) to try and write full-time — at least not until I’m of retirement age. Because I’ve also decided to try to follow G to Nevada this summer, I’ve learned my job prospects are rather pitiful there. So you know what would be nice? Being able to work from anywhere and being paid to do so…

There’s no harm in trying is there?

Let’s see… what else?

I’ve been divorced twice. Tell me why I would jump into a marriage again? I’m divorced twice, and both from military relationships. I say again, why would I jump into marriage again… and so early too? You want to hear bad things about me, feel free to ask around. I’m no angel. My collection of last names tell that story — Hoffman and Lindner are on my friends list. They won’t lie.

Regardless, stop asking when I plan to get married again. I’m not ready for that. Christ…

Resolutions…

I suppose I’ll have to deal with the fact a certain group of people will continue believing I’m “the standard”… I have to remember that I never need to defend myself from the people who actually know me and care for me. However a deep resentment still burns within me when someone comes along to tell me what I am. It only adds to my desire to be more different… and it will probably make me feel that much better when I leave them all behind…

—
I will someday earn more money and hold more assets than my boyfriend does… or fiance… or husband… or whatever funny label you want to pin on whoever he happens to be…

I will write a few books, if not for a living, then just because I feel I need to write, and it’s something I enjoy doing…

I will do my best to prove my case to the Army Discharge Review Board, and if I am successful in having my discharge upgraded and corrected, I will serve honorably in the US Air Force.

Furthermore I will continue to TRY not to judge and label others without getting to know them to some fair degree.

Losing Weight

I’ve somehow lost 10 lbs in 3 months. Unlike my BF, it isn’t healthy for me to be losing weight. I weigh 99.8 Most teenagers weigh more than me.

Too much…

I’d be lying if I said things haven’t been somewhat interesting lately. Over the last five days I’ve flown across the country from Seattle to DC, driven from DC to Rochester NY (and then back to DC after just 12 hours in NY) to visit my BF’s grandmother who had her leg amputated due to gangrene. We actually weren’t expecting her to survive the operation. Now I’m back in Maryland where my brain is fried from Swedish studies and the internet is being dysfunctional at the apartment… It’s all a bit much.

Meanwhile my own grandmother just signed a waiver releasing emergency responders from performing life saving efforts, so I might soon be flying to Maine to say goodbye to my own last living grandparent. It’s been a great year so far, what with my Dad’s cancer diagnosis… and this… but I’m going to stop bitching now, because at least I’m able to cuddle with the BF every night right, and we found an amaaazing brewery up in Rochester (we get overly excited over good beer). Ahh beeeeeeer…

Happy Valentine’s Day

Happy Valentine’s Day from Rochester, New York.

En route

I’m in the C terminal at SeaTac right now utilizing their awesomely free WiFi access, and it just crossed my mind that I’ve never sat near one of the drinking water fountains before. They appear to be programmed to produce a “water flowing glub glub” sound effect when the faucet is being utilized. It’s pretty entertaining…

Today has gone well so far, however I’m tired after sleeping for only about three hours last night. I was fighting off some pretty severe micro sleeps en route to the airport.

Check-in was a breeze, and I felt sorry for all the Delta passengers who were milling about the ticketing counter looking upset. If I were booked on a flight to the south I probably wouldn’t have bothered coming to the airport today… I mean… really? Have you heard the news or seen a weather report?

The TSA woman who checked my passport was really cool, and while standing in line I made a friend who lived in the San Francisco Bay Area for a while and knows of my hometown. The TSA guy who directed me through the metal detector complimented me on my T-shirt which reads, “I’m only here because my server is down”. Overall it’s been a happy TSA kind of trip!

Ah, actually there is one small exception. There was one TSA guy at the security station who shouted something about, “If you fail to take out and claim one little liquid in your bag — we WILL walk you!”. In response everyone in my line exchanged funny looks and were like, “Walk you? What does that mean?”. The girl behind me was like, “Did he say walk you, or lock you?”, so then the joke became, “Aw shit, they‘re going to lock us up”.

Well, that’s about it for me right now. Yeah, I still love traveling.

Adaptation

I’m almost completely packed up and ready to fly back east again. I’m pretty excited to see the BF so we can drink strong sangria and hot chocolate together (I don’t mean sangria and hot chocolate combined — ew). So tomorrow morning I’ll catch the #2 bus to Lakewood, and the #574 to SeaTac, and immediately after checking in you will find me at Starbucks… I need my Starbucks because during my flight I’ve got a lot of work to catch up on.

I hope I’m not seated to Ms. Sourface again though. That happened on my last flight over… For some reason I ended up sitting next to the most unhappy flyer I’ve ever seen. She wouldn’t even say thank you to the flight attendant.

Unfortunately our weekend plans have changed. My BF’s only living Grandmother was taken to the hospital and will be having her leg amputated. So I’ll fly into DC tomorrow night, and then Saturday night(ish) we’re going to drive up to Rochester NY to be with his family. We have to be back in Maryland before classes Tuesday.

He was so sweet on the phone earlier and kept apologizing for the change of plans and promising that we’ll have a romantic Valentine’s Day no matter what. We’re going to go back to the awesome cafe in downtown ROC that we went to together right after we first met. It should be pretty nice even if it isn’t all spent around DuPont Circle.

I’ll definitely be writing again soon! I have to go because I think a C-17 is about to crash into my house… (That’s an inside joke, and I’m sorry I had to expose you to it). Stop flying over my house Dave…

Zip Codes

You know what I hate? The people who ask for your zip code when you’re buying something at their store, or trying to navigate an automated phone system. I’m sorry, but do you know how many damn zip codes I’ve gone through in the last six years? Just accept my money or my phone call and deal with it!

Quoting Frasier

Daphne Moon: Feeling a bit lonely are we?

Niles Crane: Only when I’m by myself or when I’m with other people.